It's Aloha Friday at Bacchus! That means $6 Absolut cocktails and $4 Baker + Butcher sammies and DJ Matt at 10PM. Come on by and flirt with a hot guy; who knows, you just might take him home and have sex! (More on that below the pics.)
Sex is not a bad thing.
Nearly every corner of gay culture is drenched with images of sex worship and body adoration. With so much of it happening underneath our noses, it's surprising gay men are still embarrassed to express their love of sex out of fear of being shamed, judged, or even labeled a slut.
Men’s biological wiring is structured around sex.
Like a moth to a flame, it can lure us into a trance and sometimes keep us from seeing things logically. It’s the thrill of the hunt which keeps us from lifting our heads from our Grindr, Scruff, Adam4Adam and other apps. Yes, it may be addicting. Sure, it can also be a waste of time. But isn’t that our business?
There are those people in the community (and you know who you are) that enjoy pointing their fingers and crying “Slut!” Unconsciously we’ll single out those who are acting on a stereotype in an effort to distance ourselves from it. Meanwhile, those who are pointing their fingers with one hand have the other one on their smartphones, Grinding up a storm (yeah, they're the faceless ones that seem to dominate all the hook-up apps in Hawaii).
Stop guilt-tripping your friends for doing what they want to do. As long as they’re safe, shouldn’t it be none of our business? It’s human nature to point our fingers at others to veer the spotlight away from us, but the message we’re sending is that it’s okay to worship and idolize sex, but never okay to actually do it. Where’s the logic in that?
Don’t let other people shame you into thinking you’re a bad person or a pervert. Men love sex. We do. By letting other people make you feel bad about it doesn’t mean you're any better.
Encourage your friends to use protection during sex, because people are going to do what they’re going to do, so you might as well enforce safety. This is where the focus should be. Leave the judgments at home where they belong and…