At Bacchus, our customers know we love to give back. We’re proud sponsors of local lgbt organizations and events. We host annual open bar parties on our anniversary and Christmas and other occasions just to show the love. We’re there when you need us you don’t have to ask.
Today, to celebrate Easter and the beginning of spring, we invite you to forego the bonnet bonanzas and high-priced cocktails at other establishments and come to our festivities! As always, there’s no cover charge at Bacchus, but there are a few requirements:
You hate babies but love dogs.
No, I don’t want to hold your baby so please don’t ask me to.
The idea of cuddling makes you want to vomit.
Thanks for the sex. Now kindly get out.
When your friends ask you for relationship advice, your response is always brutally honest.
“He isn’t giving you mixed signals; he just doesn’t like you. Move on.”
You’ll try to comfort a friend who just had his heart broken, but you really don’t understand why he’s still hung up on this guy.
He cheated on you. Why do you still care?!
Some guys cry when they’re drunk. You point and laugh at them.
You’re getting tears in my vodka soda (with lime).
The guy you’re currently seeing admitted that he liked you and your response was “okay.”
I’m not going to lie and say I reciprocate when I don’t.
You’re not a relationship person.
Relationships are boring. Being single is so much more fun.
You have feelings. You just don’t like sharing them.
Keep that shit to yourself, buddy.
You spiritually relate to Samantha from “Sex And The City.”
When she says to Richard, “I love you, but I love me more,”
you’ve never related to something more in your entire life.
You’ve come close to dating a few guys, but in the end you just couldn’t do it.
It’s better off this way, for both of us.
And, finally, you are invited if:
On Instagram you hashtag #every #fucking #meaningless #word
Because if you do, you will enjoy the game we’re playing at the bar today…
You’re Egg Hunt! Totally!
If you've made it this far and haven't figured it out (believe us, people are still commenting and complaining about our 2016 logo change and they're still searching for our hidden back room, This is April Fools. And, yes, we know the difference between you’re and your and even yore! Come to Trivia Night tomorrow and discover the difference between four, fore and for.